I can understand your situation as a teacher :-)] but what is heavy on my heart is that I believe many couples have bought in to the world’s view of children (I sure did at first) and therefore many have no children or maybe two at best. For me this was a matter of faith. I asked God how many we should have and how many we should adopt and we did that over the years. God suppled our needs. We did not decide based on our means. I made about 5.00 per hour when we started our family and we had one income. i can’t imagine what it would have been like if we did not take the path that we did.
Every day the preciousness of my children and the significance of being a father swim deeply in my soul.
(that feeling does faulter when they are fighting, cranky, or dis-repectful), but then they fall asleep and I look at their precious little faces - and remember again.
Just kidding.
I enjoy playing with my nephews; but I get to hand them back in a few hours. So I bypass a lot of the negative parts of the job!
I don’t know how you parents do it. I would go crazy if I had to keep them 24/7.
You fathers are better men than I.
I had no idea how intensely I would love Ryan until he was born. It was indescribeable the feeling that I had when I saw him for the first time. My heart grew and I love him in a way that I never knew before. Sometimes he drives me a bit crazy and can be a lot of work, but what he gives me is a million times more than what he takes from me.
God created every person out of His love and gave them to this world (some into healthy families and some into dyfunctional families) to care for. Unfortunately, we often fall short and tragically some children suffer abuse and neglect at the hands of those who were charged to protect, guide, and care for them.
About having or not having children, I believe that is a personal decision. Some people desire to have children while others don’t. I don’t think it is appropriate to judge those who have decided that they don’t want children. I don’t know if it’s a “world view” thing but if people are definately not wanting to commit to all the things it takes to raise children, then they shouldn’t have them. The same thing goes for people who desire to have a certain number of children. We would be happy with just Ryan but we want him to have a sibling. Kirk and I both have a sibling and we see an advantage to that. So, we are hoping to have 2 children in our family by whatever means God decides (via me or adoption). Both of which we have been prayerfully considering over the past year. If God leads us to a third through adoption, then that is what we will do, but our current plan is 2.
what is heavy on my heart is that I believe many couples have bought in to the world’s view of children (I sure did at first) and therefore many have no children or maybe two at best.
When I read this, I had two reactions: one personal and one intellectual. I will handle the intellectual reaction first and will then deal with my personal reaction.
The Intellectual Response:
When I read Jim's comment, two passages came to mind:
2 Co 9:6-86 Now this I say, he who sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and he who sows bountifully will also reap bountifully. 7
Each one must do just as he has purposed in his heart, not grudgingly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver. 8 And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that always having all sufficiency in everything, you may have an abundance for every good deed
and
Romans 8:3 For what the Law could not do, weak as it was through the flesh, God did
I take a bit of exception to the idea that the degree to which a person has bought into a worldly view of children is a function of the number of kids a person has. This is a concept that is completely indefensible from Scripture. Certainly, in Genesis, Adam and Eve were commanded to populate the earth and to be stewards of it and a large family was definitely assumed to be a sign of God's blessing. Further, there are a number of proverbs that speak of children being a blessing from God.
However, in the new testament, there is no prescription for the number of children a disciple is to have. References in Ephesians, Colossians, and 1 Timothy make reference to children and parenting but do not say things like, "Fathers, do not exasperate your children, of which you must have a minimum of two."
The passages I quoted above are relevant to this issue though they do not speak specifically to parenting. First, Romans 8:3 speaks to the end of the law. What the law was unable to do, Christ did. This is why it is true that Christ didn't abolish the law but he fulfilled it. And I would add that he superceded it as well. We do not gain favor with God by following rules. The idea of a minimum number of children is not only a rule but could also be construed by some as a standard of self-righteousness.
The passage from 2 Corinthians is related specifically to tithing yet the idea of joyful participation in kingdom life is a predominant theme throughout the bible. God has not made us moral nor behavioral automatons. He takes pleasure in us living lives of desire for him. He longs for us to be aroused by him and to participate in the kingdom he has created. He is not a tyrant commanding the forced supplication of sycophants. He is the God who wants us to joyfully participate in the kingdom.
So then, we have freedom to live our lives in view of what God has for us and what we desire in our own lives. My experience with God over 20 years of discipleship is that he works in me to shape my desires to progressively fit my place in the kingdom and my development as a human with spirit. I say "a human with spirit" intentionally because it conveys the idea that we have physical wants and needs and we have a spirit that transcends those wants and needs, yet which also must be tended and grown.
Discipleship is a decades-long process of gradually (and usually glacially) learning how to fully release ourselves into the kingdom, in the way that God envisions. One of my key life verses is Ephesians 2:10: "For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them." I love that verse deeply; it has shaped my approach to discipleship and my relationship with God for many years. God has a vision for my life and I need to learn how to progressively flesh that vision out and express it to the world and the kingdom.
It is for all these reasons that I reject the notion that the number of children a Christian has is indicative of their ability to have evaded the trappings of the world's view of children or (as I think was implied by the comment) to have gained a certain measure of God's favor. It is an idea rooted in the law, and one which seemingly rejects individual freedom in Christ, which is worked out in community and in one on one relationship with God.
The Personal Response:
I had a substantially abusive childhood. Some of that abuse was sexual in nature. Boys who are sexually abused have a higher risk of becoming sexual abusers themselves. I have done a lot of work to deal with my past and some of my most personal and powerful reasons for believing that God is real are the result of some hard, painful work to come to terms with my past. In the early 90's when I was in counseling, God became vibrantly real to me. He led me through a lot of shit. There's no other word for it. It was awful stuff.
And God has changed me. Yet, there is still a residue, there is still lingering damage.
Around this same time, I was reading Exodus. And in chapter 20, God hands off the 10 commandments to Moses and says this:
4 Do not make idols of any kind, whether in the shape of birds or animals or fish. 5 You must never worship or bow down to them, for I, the LORD your God, am a jealous God who will not share your affection with any other god! I do not leave unpunished the sins of those who hate me, but I punish the children for the sins of their parents to the third and fourth generations.
There is a tremendous amount of depth and mystery to this passage but suffice it to say that there is a lot of generational sin on both my mom's and dad's sides of the family tree. A lot of heavy duty, yet unfortunately, quite human sin. And when people do hurtful things to other people, there's no question that idolatry is involved.
As I studied this passage and talked with God about it, it weighed heavy on me. Deep in me. I had this image of a tremendously large tree trunk with two massive branches rising out of it. The trunk was the concentration of the weight of the Johnson and Reynolds generational sin and it's weight was focused on me.
What surfaced was a desire for the generational sin to end with me. Without knowing what I was really asking, I told God I wanted him to do whatever it took for the generational sin to end with me and go no further. Part of that involved me dealing with stuff I would preferred to have continued to deny.
The other part was to decide I didn't want to have kids. It was kind of a counter-intuitive decision for me because I'm pretty good with kids, mostly because I'm still one myself. But I knew that there would always be the risk that if I had kids, I would at best pass off generational sin and at worst, abuse them in spite of my desire not to.
I've told this story to people many times and what amazes me is how many people assume they have better insight into my life than than Tanya and I do. I've had many Christians actually tell me that I am not trusting God with that choice. In their simplistic view of life and Jesus, they can't fathom that a Christian would molest their own kids. They think that salvation ameliorates the consequences of childhood damage. They say things like, "You need to trust God with this, trust him to change you so that you don't molest your kids."
Only my best friends have asked me the questions I'm pretty sure most people are thinking: "Do you fear this because you have molested kids in the past or do you have desires to do so?" To both questions, the answer is No. But I'm familiar enough with temptation to know that sometimes, sin nails you unexpectedly.
In these conversations, I have found that many Christians just assume that having kids is what you do. And that God just sort of insulates us all from the consequences of sin. Oh sure, we have sin but it's not really that bad. It's almost as if people believe that Christian sin is somehow different from nonChristian sin. Almost like our sin isn't as bad or as risky or as awful or as damaging. They whitewash things by saying, "Well, sure we all sin against our kids but that doesn't mean God isn't faithful..."
And for many Christians, the choice to not have kids is anathema to vital discipleship. To state it more pointedly, for some Christians, kids are idols.
So for me, in a strange way, I feel like I am loving the children I don't have by not having them because for me, the risk of damaging them is more significant to me than fulfilling someone else's expectation of me. And most importantly, I have a clear conscience on this. Someone once told me I would regret not having kids once I got older. I don't think so because I think this is a decision that God and I worked out. I don't think so because it is the one way I know for sure that the heavy trunk of the Johnson and Reynolds generational dysfunction will end with me.
---------------------------------------
I believe in God because every once in a while, I hear a voice that says, "You're my favorite."
Wow, Dave. Thank you for sharing your personal and intense story. This type of protective and unselfish love (for the children you don’t have) is absolutely God honoring.
Hey Dave,
thanks for putting a bit of your journey out there for us to share… I appreciate your heart and find it to be proof that “the journey” God takes each of us on is unique and your act of faith and obedience to God is different from others… and yet.. .both are authenically prayed through, faithful followers of Christ responses.
Blessings,
Jeff
I appreciate that people have valued my story. Sometimes, it can be a risk with people to talk about this kind of stuff but it really is an important part of my experience with God. Many abuse victims feel reluctant to talk about their pasts because there’s a lot of conflicting emotions and thoughts surrounding it all. Bringing God into the mix makes it worse in some ways because now you have to contend with an omnipotent, loving God who could have intervened but didn’t.
I talk about this part of my story openly because I think it’s an important reality that we need to deal with. I think there are many people who long to connect with God for healing but too many times, simple, super-spiritual, pat answers are tossed up, like “Just trust God,” “Pray more about it,” “Paul said to set the past behind you and set your eyes on the prize ahead…” All true and useful, but for many, this is the extent to which they want to be involved in dealing with damaged people. Quote a verse and withdraw from the person who could use some comfort.
It also reminds me what God has done for me. Writing in this thread has reminded me that he has cared for me and helped me. He brought a number of adults into my life when I was a kid who helped me, cared for me and gave me some vision for my life. Had it not been for them, I hate think what could’ve happened to me.
Anyway, thanks for being supportive and an awesome group of people.
I believe in God because every once in a while, I hear a voice that says, “You’re my favorite.”
If anyone was curious if Nigel and I were going to be having children, his previous e-mail should answer your question. I am sure some day he will change his mind…..
Any of you trying to decide whether or not to have kids are welcome to babysit my own and then decide for yourselves! Either they will inspire you to have yours, or will serve as excellent birth control.
Keep in mind that at this time there are about 5,000 kids in California in need of parents and taking care of orphans is heavy on God’s heart. I for one would like to take them all in but our house is not big enough so I am recruiting.
1 Tim 4:10 “bringing up children” is part of a list of activities that are called “good deeds”… mom’s be encouraged… God sees your labor of love and values it.
I’ve had people ask me if I knew about birth control (probably more than you), asked “Do you know how babies happen?” (Yes I went through three years of nursing school and know how babies are made) ask, “Are they all yours? (What do you mean by that?) “I sure couldn’t do it!” of course said with disdain (I’m sure you couldn’t with that attitude), and others who bowed at me and told me I must be a saint (all Christians are), but this is the first time I’ve had someone allude that I am idolatrous because I have kids. This is very encouraging. (NOT!)
Of course, I believe that people should consult with God about this subject and also what their life calling is. I don’t believe everyone should marry or have kids. But children are people, and everyone is loved by God, not just the young adults. Don’t despise children because they are messy, loud, and hard work. We are all God’s children.
See http://www.kidsdata.org/topictrends.jsp?t=2&i=6&...
75,000 children in foster care in California in 2006. Over 2,000 in Santa Clara County alone. Some are with relatives, but there is a great need for families willing and able to take in kids. Some are eventually adoptable. (Like our wonderful kids!)
How many times have I told you, how many times have my words been ignored? Why won’t my children listen to me? Sound familiar? I don’t talk like that either, but the thoughts and feelings are there.
When I catch myself in that type of thought, I get a glimpse of what our Father must be wondering as I wander my way through my own life. What a patient and forgiving God we have.
We are all who we are from the experiences we have, the lives we touch, and more importantly, the choices we make during and/or following those experiences. Children, and life in general, can challenge our patients, our capacity for forgiving, and loving unconditionally.
If you are still following me on this, my kids have been the vehicle of my growth and closer relationship with our Lord God. And although I constantly mess up, by trying to reflect a small portion of the patients and love God shows me through to my children, my hope is that they realize where that love is coming from, and pass that along to either their own children, or whomever lives they touch and care for.
I was told … God gave us kids to make us HOLY … not HAPPY.
The process of parenting, loving, disciplining, and training up children.. .produces great opportunity for God to mold and shape us! Dean… sounds like you are in that process as I am!
On the idea of choosing not to have children…
I wouldn’t be who I was today without my kids, I learned to much in teaching them. My life is fuller because of them.
But…
There are so many things open to those who feel this is not something God has for them. On the mission field, (our kids being older)we are free to do so many different things, that our missionary friends with kids are not. We have so much more time and freedom now. They same would apply to those without kids.
And besides Lisa is great in Journey Land, maybe because she is not burned out. But then, so is Linda, so …. God is bigger than all of it.
All depends
It all depends…do I get to give them back at the end of the school day or do I have to keep them? (just kidding—okay—mostly kidding). :)
There are good qualities in every child…with some the search is down a very winding and cruvvy and dangerous road…but worth the trip.
well...
I can understand your situation as a teacher :-)] but what is heavy on my heart is that I believe many couples have bought in to the world’s view of children (I sure did at first) and therefore many have no children or maybe two at best. For me this was a matter of faith. I asked God how many we should have and how many we should adopt and we did that over the years. God suppled our needs. We did not decide based on our means. I made about 5.00 per hour when we started our family and we had one income. i can’t imagine what it would have been like if we did not take the path that we did.
Huge Blessing
Every day the preciousness of my children and the significance of being a father swim deeply in my soul.
(that feeling does faulter when they are fighting, cranky, or dis-repectful), but then they fall asleep and I look at their precious little faces - and remember again.
:)
Spawn of the devil!
Just kidding.
I enjoy playing with my nephews; but I get to hand them back in a few hours. So I bypass a lot of the negative parts of the job!
I don’t know how you parents do it. I would go crazy if I had to keep them 24/7.
You fathers are better men than I.
Nigel-
All joking aside
I had no idea how intensely I would love Ryan until he was born. It was indescribeable the feeling that I had when I saw him for the first time. My heart grew and I love him in a way that I never knew before. Sometimes he drives me a bit crazy and can be a lot of work, but what he gives me is a million times more than what he takes from me.
God created every person out of His love and gave them to this world (some into healthy families and some into dyfunctional families) to care for. Unfortunately, we often fall short and tragically some children suffer abuse and neglect at the hands of those who were charged to protect, guide, and care for them.
About having or not having children, I believe that is a personal decision. Some people desire to have children while others don’t. I don’t think it is appropriate to judge those who have decided that they don’t want children. I don’t know if it’s a “world view” thing but if people are definately not wanting to commit to all the things it takes to raise children, then they shouldn’t have them. The same thing goes for people who desire to have a certain number of children. We would be happy with just Ryan but we want him to have a sibling. Kirk and I both have a sibling and we see an advantage to that. So, we are hoping to have 2 children in our family by whatever means God decides (via me or adoption). Both of which we have been prayerfully considering over the past year. If God leads us to a third through adoption, then that is what we will do, but our current plan is 2.
Want to make God laugh? Tell Him your plans.
Hold On A Second
Jim said:
When I read this, I had two reactions: one personal and one intellectual. I will handle the intellectual reaction first and will then deal with my personal reaction.
The Intellectual Response:
When I read Jim's comment, two passages came to mind:
Each one must do just as he has purposed in his heart, not grudgingly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver. 8 And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that always having all sufficiency in everything, you may have an abundance for every good deedand
I take a bit of exception to the idea that the degree to which a person has bought into a worldly view of children is a function of the number of kids a person has. This is a concept that is completely indefensible from Scripture. Certainly, in Genesis, Adam and Eve were commanded to populate the earth and to be stewards of it and a large family was definitely assumed to be a sign of God's blessing. Further, there are a number of proverbs that speak of children being a blessing from God.
However, in the new testament, there is no prescription for the number of children a disciple is to have. References in Ephesians, Colossians, and 1 Timothy make reference to children and parenting but do not say things like, "Fathers, do not exasperate your children, of which you must have a minimum of two."
The passages I quoted above are relevant to this issue though they do not speak specifically to parenting. First, Romans 8:3 speaks to the end of the law. What the law was unable to do, Christ did. This is why it is true that Christ didn't abolish the law but he fulfilled it. And I would add that he superceded it as well. We do not gain favor with God by following rules. The idea of a minimum number of children is not only a rule but could also be construed by some as a standard of self-righteousness.
The passage from 2 Corinthians is related specifically to tithing yet the idea of joyful participation in kingdom life is a predominant theme throughout the bible. God has not made us moral nor behavioral automatons. He takes pleasure in us living lives of desire for him. He longs for us to be aroused by him and to participate in the kingdom he has created. He is not a tyrant commanding the forced supplication of sycophants. He is the God who wants us to joyfully participate in the kingdom.
So then, we have freedom to live our lives in view of what God has for us and what we desire in our own lives. My experience with God over 20 years of discipleship is that he works in me to shape my desires to progressively fit my place in the kingdom and my development as a human with spirit. I say "a human with spirit" intentionally because it conveys the idea that we have physical wants and needs and we have a spirit that transcends those wants and needs, yet which also must be tended and grown.
Discipleship is a decades-long process of gradually (and usually glacially) learning how to fully release ourselves into the kingdom, in the way that God envisions. One of my key life verses is Ephesians 2:10: "For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them." I love that verse deeply; it has shaped my approach to discipleship and my relationship with God for many years. God has a vision for my life and I need to learn how to progressively flesh that vision out and express it to the world and the kingdom.
It is for all these reasons that I reject the notion that the number of children a Christian has is indicative of their ability to have evaded the trappings of the world's view of children or (as I think was implied by the comment) to have gained a certain measure of God's favor. It is an idea rooted in the law, and one which seemingly rejects individual freedom in Christ, which is worked out in community and in one on one relationship with God.
The Personal Response:
I had a substantially abusive childhood. Some of that abuse was sexual in nature. Boys who are sexually abused have a higher risk of becoming sexual abusers themselves. I have done a lot of work to deal with my past and some of my most personal and powerful reasons for believing that God is real are the result of some hard, painful work to come to terms with my past. In the early 90's when I was in counseling, God became vibrantly real to me. He led me through a lot of shit. There's no other word for it. It was awful stuff.
And God has changed me. Yet, there is still a residue, there is still lingering damage.
Around this same time, I was reading Exodus. And in chapter 20, God hands off the 10 commandments to Moses and says this:
There is a tremendous amount of depth and mystery to this passage but suffice it to say that there is a lot of generational sin on both my mom's and dad's sides of the family tree. A lot of heavy duty, yet unfortunately, quite human sin. And when people do hurtful things to other people, there's no question that idolatry is involved.
As I studied this passage and talked with God about it, it weighed heavy on me. Deep in me. I had this image of a tremendously large tree trunk with two massive branches rising out of it. The trunk was the concentration of the weight of the Johnson and Reynolds generational sin and it's weight was focused on me.
What surfaced was a desire for the generational sin to end with me. Without knowing what I was really asking, I told God I wanted him to do whatever it took for the generational sin to end with me and go no further. Part of that involved me dealing with stuff I would preferred to have continued to deny.
The other part was to decide I didn't want to have kids. It was kind of a counter-intuitive decision for me because I'm pretty good with kids, mostly because I'm still one myself. But I knew that there would always be the risk that if I had kids, I would at best pass off generational sin and at worst, abuse them in spite of my desire not to.
I've told this story to people many times and what amazes me is how many people assume they have better insight into my life than than Tanya and I do. I've had many Christians actually tell me that I am not trusting God with that choice. In their simplistic view of life and Jesus, they can't fathom that a Christian would molest their own kids. They think that salvation ameliorates the consequences of childhood damage. They say things like, "You need to trust God with this, trust him to change you so that you don't molest your kids."
Only my best friends have asked me the questions I'm pretty sure most people are thinking: "Do you fear this because you have molested kids in the past or do you have desires to do so?" To both questions, the answer is No. But I'm familiar enough with temptation to know that sometimes, sin nails you unexpectedly.
In these conversations, I have found that many Christians just assume that having kids is what you do. And that God just sort of insulates us all from the consequences of sin. Oh sure, we have sin but it's not really that bad. It's almost as if people believe that Christian sin is somehow different from nonChristian sin. Almost like our sin isn't as bad or as risky or as awful or as damaging. They whitewash things by saying, "Well, sure we all sin against our kids but that doesn't mean God isn't faithful..."
And for many Christians, the choice to not have kids is anathema to vital discipleship. To state it more pointedly, for some Christians, kids are idols.
So for me, in a strange way, I feel like I am loving the children I don't have by not having them because for me, the risk of damaging them is more significant to me than fulfilling someone else's expectation of me. And most importantly, I have a clear conscience on this. Someone once told me I would regret not having kids once I got older. I don't think so because I think this is a decision that God and I worked out. I don't think so because it is the one way I know for sure that the heavy trunk of the Johnson and Reynolds generational dysfunction will end with me.
---------------------------------------
I believe in God because every once in a while, I hear a voice that says, "You're my favorite."
Thank you
Thank you for sharing your heart and soul on this topic, Dave.
Wow, Dave. Thank you for
Wow, Dave. Thank you for sharing your personal and intense story. This type of protective and unselfish love (for the children you don’t have) is absolutely God honoring.
Proof
Hey Dave,
thanks for putting a bit of your journey out there for us to share… I appreciate your heart and find it to be proof that “the journey” God takes each of us on is unique and your act of faith and obedience to God is different from others… and yet.. .both are authenically prayed through, faithful followers of Christ responses.
Blessings,
Jeff
Thanks for the Support
I appreciate that people have valued my story. Sometimes, it can be a risk with people to talk about this kind of stuff but it really is an important part of my experience with God. Many abuse victims feel reluctant to talk about their pasts because there’s a lot of conflicting emotions and thoughts surrounding it all. Bringing God into the mix makes it worse in some ways because now you have to contend with an omnipotent, loving God who could have intervened but didn’t.
I talk about this part of my story openly because I think it’s an important reality that we need to deal with. I think there are many people who long to connect with God for healing but too many times, simple, super-spiritual, pat answers are tossed up, like “Just trust God,” “Pray more about it,” “Paul said to set the past behind you and set your eyes on the prize ahead…” All true and useful, but for many, this is the extent to which they want to be involved in dealing with damaged people. Quote a verse and withdraw from the person who could use some comfort.
It also reminds me what God has done for me. Writing in this thread has reminded me that he has cared for me and helped me. He brought a number of adults into my life when I was a kid who helped me, cared for me and gave me some vision for my life. Had it not been for them, I hate think what could’ve happened to me.
Anyway, thanks for being supportive and an awesome group of people.
I believe in God because every once in a while, I hear a voice that says, “You’re my favorite.”
No Children for the Price's
If anyone was curious if Nigel and I were going to be having children, his previous e-mail should answer your question. I am sure some day he will change his mind…..
Feel free to baby sit then
Any of you trying to decide whether or not to have kids are welcome to babysit my own and then decide for yourselves! Either they will inspire you to have yours, or will serve as excellent birth control.
parents wanted (right here in this state)
Keep in mind that at this time there are about 5,000 kids in California in need of parents and taking care of orphans is heavy on God’s heart. I for one would like to take them all in but our house is not big enough so I am recruiting.
for moms (foster or otherwise) only
1 Tim 4:10 “bringing up children” is part of a list of activities that are called “good deeds”… mom’s be encouraged… God sees your labor of love and values it.
Idolatry?
I’ve had people ask me if I knew about birth control (probably more than you), asked “Do you know how babies happen?” (Yes I went through three years of nursing school and know how babies are made) ask, “Are they all yours? (What do you mean by that?) “I sure couldn’t do it!” of course said with disdain (I’m sure you couldn’t with that attitude), and others who bowed at me and told me I must be a saint (all Christians are), but this is the first time I’ve had someone allude that I am idolatrous because I have kids. This is very encouraging. (NOT!)
Of course, I believe that people should consult with God about this subject and also what their life calling is. I don’t believe everyone should marry or have kids. But children are people, and everyone is loved by God, not just the young adults. Don’t despise children because they are messy, loud, and hard work. We are all God’s children.
# of children in foster care in California
See http://www.kidsdata.org/topictrends.jsp?t=2&i=6&...
75,000 children in foster care in California in 2006. Over 2,000 in Santa Clara County alone. Some are with relatives, but there is a great need for families willing and able to take in kids. Some are eventually adoptable. (Like our wonderful kids!)
A glimps of what the Father sees
How many times have I told you, how many times have my words been ignored? Why won’t my children listen to me? Sound familiar? I don’t talk like that either, but the thoughts and feelings are there.
When I catch myself in that type of thought, I get a glimpse of what our Father must be wondering as I wander my way through my own life. What a patient and forgiving God we have.
We are all who we are from the experiences we have, the lives we touch, and more importantly, the choices we make during and/or following those experiences. Children, and life in general, can challenge our patients, our capacity for forgiving, and loving unconditionally.
If you are still following me on this, my kids have been the vehicle of my growth and closer relationship with our Lord God. And although I constantly mess up, by trying to reflect a small portion of the patients and love God shows me through to my children, my hope is that they realize where that love is coming from, and pass that along to either their own children, or whomever lives they touch and care for.
YBFAM,
Dean Floyd
so true
Well said Dean.
Happy or Holy?
I was told … God gave us kids to make us HOLY … not HAPPY.
The process of parenting, loving, disciplining, and training up children.. .produces great opportunity for God to mold and shape us! Dean… sounds like you are in that process as I am!
grace
Children have helped me over the years to really understand God’s unconditional love and grace.
funny mom video
http://cosmos.bcst.yahoo.com/ver/223/popup/index...
Anita Renfroe Rocks!
She says things that everyone else is to embarrassed to admit :D
“Maybe this world is another planet’s Hell.â€Â- Aldous Huxley
to kid or not to kid
On the idea of choosing not to have children…
I wouldn’t be who I was today without my kids, I learned to much in teaching them. My life is fuller because of them.
But…
There are so many things open to those who feel this is not something God has for them. On the mission field, (our kids being older)we are free to do so many different things, that our missionary friends with kids are not. We have so much more time and freedom now. They same would apply to those without kids.
And besides Lisa is great in Journey Land, maybe because she is not burned out. But then, so is Linda, so …. God is bigger than all of it.